And I’m Feeling? Well, I’m Not Too Sure.

facebook-profile-picture By Phoebe

As I am coming in to the last few weeks of wedding planning, everything seems to be coming together. Looking back at all the Lists I wrote, everything has been ticked off. Of course there are still the odd jobs to do but Im not too worried. Im also not excited, and not particularly nervous. Is this normal? I feel as if I am just waiting for it to happen now.

Dont Tell The Bride style, I am going down to stay with my parents for the last 3 weeks and Michael is staying up North. Im hoping that it will make it a lot more special when we see each other, but I am also dreading the weeks apart, especially if he hasn’t completed his to-do list!!

Its all quite surreal, I feel that as a woman, the wedding day is the pinnacle, the best day of our lives…and right now, Im just concerned that I have a lot of ironing to do. Im hoping for a wave of realisation or that tummy sinking excited/nervous feeling but for the last few months I haven’t had it. Pourquoi?

How To Chose Your Entourage

facebook-profile-picture By Phoebe


There was no question when I got engaged that my best friend would be my chief bridesmaid. My sister understood, she stole my Barbies, make-up and clothes for 15 years, therefore she no longer qualified.


My best friend of 19 years shot-gunned the role a decade ago, we planned our engagement rings, our weddings and even our prospective husbands. And even though I am not marrying a Gucci modeling doctor with a south african accent with a penchant for cookery, dog walking and fine art (the list did go on), my choice of chief bridesmaid remains the same. She is my constant. And I love her.


As for the rest of my entourage, I have my sister, two close friends and two cousins as flower girls. It is important to surround yourself with people you will be able to trust not just on the day, but the lead up to the wedding too. My crew have been indispensable. Make sure you pick the same!

L-R my sister, my best friend, me, bridesmaid (other one was in Oz)

Let Them Eat Cake…

facebook-profile-picture By Phoebe

My Wedding Bible contained copious amounts of cake photos. My advice is that you first decide how much you are willing to spend on such sugary goodness. I say this because when I realised my dream cake was Β£1,500, I was a little heart broken.


Decide on flavour or flavours. Many brides move away from the traditional fruit cake. Mine is three tiers of fruit, chocolate and carrot cake. Traditionally the top tier is kept and eaten at the christening of the couples first child, but as mine is the most delicious layer, that wont be happening.

Shop around, go cake tasting. Cakes can be a work of art, and there is so much choice now, from small cupcakes to six tiers of heaven! The Americans definitely lead the way on extravagant cakes, I am hoping it will become the norm within the UK.

Bon Appetite!


Even If You Dont Have A Traditional Wedding | uk wedding blog

facebook-profile-picture By Phoebe


There are some wonderful traditions surrounding weddings so why not up hold a few on your day? Here are some of my favourites, from the romantic, to down right ludicrous.

Proposal – In the past when the marriage proposal was a more formal procedure, the prospective groom sent his friends or members of his family to represent his interests to the prospective bride and her family. If they saw a blind man, a monk or a pregnant woman during their journey it was thought that the marriage would be doomed if they continued their journey as these sights were thought to be bad omens. If, however, they saw nanny goats, pigeons or wolves these were good omens which would bring good fortune to the marriage.
The Wedding Dress – It is thought unlucky for the bride to make her own wedding dress.The bride should not wear her entire outfit before the wedding day. Some brides leave the last stitch unsown until she leaves the house.

On The Way To The Wedding – When the bride is ready to leave the house for the wedding ceremony a last look in the mirror will bring her good luck. However returning to the mirror once she has began her journey will result in bad luck.Seeing a chimney sweep on the way to a wedding is thought to bring good luck and it is still possible to hire one to attend wedding ceremonies. Other good luck omens when seen on the way to the ceremony include lambs, toads, spiders, black cats and rainbows.

Seeing an open grave, a pig, a lizard, or hearing a cockerel crow after dawn are all thought to be omens of bad luck. Monks and nuns are also a bad omen. This may be because the are associated with poverty and chastity. They are also thought to signal a dependence on charity by the newlyweds.

Bad weather on the way to the wedding is thought to be an omen of an unhappy marriage, although in some cultures rain is considered a good omen. Cloudy skies and wind are believed to cause stormy marriages. Snow on the other hand is associated with fertility and wealth.

The Couple’s First Purchase – It is said that the first partner who buys a new item after the wedding will be the dominant one in the relationship. Many brides ensure that they make the first purchase by arranging to buy a small item such as a pin from the chief bridesmaid immediately after the ceremony. Hence the sixpence in the shoe!

Shoes – In the past there have been a number of customs involving shoes which were thought to bring good luck. The best known, which is still upheld, is to tie shoes to the back of the newlyweds’ car. This has evolved from the Tudor custom where guests would throw shoes at the newlywed couple. It was considered lucky if they or their carriage were hit.

Less well known is for the bride’s father to give the groom a pair of the bride’s shoes to symbolise the passing of responsibility for the daughter to her new husband. A variation of the custom is for the groom to tap the bride on the forehead with one of the shoes to assert his dominance.

The custom of the bride throwing her bouquet over her shoulder, was originally performed by her throwing one of her shoes.

The Best Man – It is the best man’s duty to protect the groom from bad luck. He must ensure that once the groom has began his journey to the church he does not return for any reason.

He must also arrange for the groom to carry a small mascot or charm in his pocket on the wedding day.

When the best man is paying the church minister’s fee he should pay him an odd sum to bring luck to the couple.

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Good Wedding Etiquette | uk wedding blog

facebook-profile-picture By Phoebe


A few Christmases ago I was given a Debrett’s book on etiquette (here) As a young bride (23) I entered the world of weddings quite oblivious. The last wedding I attended was when I was a bridesmaid age 12. There are of course certain etiquettes that should be followed and are sadly being ignored.

Here are a few…
Invitations – they should be worded from whoever is hosting the wedding and the RSVP should be on the left hand-side. The RSVP should go to the bride’s parents.
Seating Plan – On the top table there should be the bride, groom, their parents, chief bridesmaid and best man.
Speeches – The father of the bride, groom and best man make speeches. Woman are not meant to make speeches, they therefore remain enigmatic.
Of course, it isn’t always as simple as this, so see my next post on wedding traditions which can still be upheld even if the traditional wedding is not being observed.
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Mr & Mrs….Why Not Brag About It?

facebook-profile-picture By Phoebe

You have spent days, months and years planning your perfect day. Why not brag about it afterwards? If I could, I would have all my clothes embroidered with “mrs”.

I think being married is not only a life long commitment to your other half. It is something to be very proud of in this day and age. Compared to the 1950s, marriage rates are 40%-50% lower. More marriages are ending in divorce and the unmarried population have increased dramatically since the 1970s.


There is a reason why the government wanted to give tax breaks to married couples. So why not emblazon your marital status on mugs, walls, cushions and random objet du dΓ©sir?!

Why I Wanted A Church Wedding | uk wedding blog

facebook-profile-picture By Phoebe

To me, my dream wedding would not have been complete if it wasn’t in a church. Im not particularly religious, and I am not getting married in a church for the grandeur.

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Ladies and Gentlemen…take your seats.

facebook-profile-picture By Phoebe

The seating plan: it is an evolving and nightmare aspect to the wedding planning. I have been having a love-hate relationship with mine for about a year now. We finally sat down (no pun intended) and worked things out.


You have to tread delicately on certain aspects of the seating plan. Especially if family politics are involved.


Many venues will dictate what seating arrangements are possible. Chose the one that you feel your guests will be most comfortable in, and of course the one that gives them the best views of the Bride and Groom.

Most importantly, mix up the tables. Weddings are a fantastic opportunity to meet new people, and with the wine flowing, perhaps new romances.
photo one from here

Birds of a Feather

facebook-profile-picture By Phoebe

Add a bit of country chic to your wedding with fur and feathers. The tweed, shooting, equestrian style is making a comeback this autumn. So why not add it to your wedding?


Beautiful peacock blues, sumptuous iridescent browns and speckled greys. They work fabulously with muted pinks, taupes and ivory.

Put them on the tables, in your hair, in your bouquets. They bring an added element of aristocracy, and one can never have too much of that!

photo 1: flickr.com
photo 3: The latter is my good friend Lindsay Hadden.

What is your wedding’s mood?

facebook-profile-picture By Phoebe

My Wedding Bible is full of mini mood boards. It contains cuttings from everywhere, ripped out of magazines, printed for the internet, swatches of fabric and my own sketches.


They help collate all of your ideas and give an overall theme. Or show you that you have no theme, as was the case for my own wedding. It is a great tool when showing suppliers what the overall “mood” of your wedding is.

They can be time consuming and take a while till they form your mood, but they a little pieces of artwork in themselves that help to paint a thousand words. So get glueing!
Mood Board from Kim Gray and Weddingbeepro