Megatone Wedding|The Guest List, The Budget The Big Save!
When the excited ‘I’m engaged’ bubble is soon burst with ‘who will we upset by not inviting them?’ and ‘how are we going to pay for this?’
I’ve always known the Guest List would be a BIG problem for us, and have always been scared to put pen to paper and work out the numbers we would be coming out with. I have a massive family, my dad is one of 8 and my Mum is one of 6 which has meant I have had such an amazing and I think privileged upbringing having over 30 cousins to play and grow up with. Family means so much to me, and not to have everyone there would upset me. I have been to weddings where some cousins have been invited to the day, others just to the evening, or all cousins just to the evening. I totally respect any couples decisions as I know how hard it is and at the end of the day you can’t have everyone you want due to venue sizes and the hardest thing about weddings MONEY!
Tone and I both are very fortunate to have a lot of friends, and most of them are in serious relationships, where we have made great friends with their other halves, so when we decided we could have around 15 friends each to the day, this soon turned to another 60 guests! So when we started hitting 180 guests we had to make a decision to cut somewhere.
The fairest way we could think of was not inviting children as we had 23 on the list. This decision really did upset me and made me worry about upsetting others, I know people argue children don’t cost as much at weddings, but when you’re planning a marquee wedding it means 2-3 extra tables, the chairs, the cutlery, the food, a bigger marquee, so taking the children out saved us around £800. I couldn’t believe the support we had from family and friends whose children were not invited, they all said how they were looking forward to getting to have a day out together and both could have a good drink and dance! We have had some who can’t make it due the ‘no children’ rule but these have all been very kind about the situation. So any couples out there worrying about making the ‘no children’ choice, please don’t stress like I did about not inviting children, from weddings I’ve been to this year I have actually realised a child free day could make the day go a little smoother and parents can enjoy the day themselves rather than having to chase the little ones around or take them for naps.
There are so many other friends we would have loved to invite to the day, but when you’re looking at spending around £100 a guest you just can’t have everyone, so some just have to wait to join the PARTY in the evening! Again I think I worried too much by offending friends with evening invitations rather than day, but I really shouldn’t have! If they are a good friend they will totally understand and if they are a great friend….I’m sure they made the cut!
The Guest List leads straight in to the BUDGET, probably the most awkward thing to talk about when it comes to your wedding, the most scary and the most depressing! I have always dreamt of the big white wedding, working in the wedding industry and just being me, I like everything to be perfect and stress about the smallest of things like what type of knife and forks will we have, this doesn’t work so well with a wedding budget. We sat down with my parents and wrote a list of all the things we thought we would need to sort and our guestimates on how much each thing would cost, the end total was terrifying!
The amount we are spending on the day makes me have two views, ‘Business head Megan’ thinks is absolutely ridiculous we should be investing it in buying another house, or savings for the future and the other ‘You only live once Megan’ thinks it’s going to be one of the best days of our lives so why not have it just the way you dream of it and if you want something in life you work hard to make it happen. We certainly have been saving so hard, today it will be 5 months till the big day, and Tone the romantic highlighted only 5 more paydays! Our parents too are being very generous which will help us massively and we can’t thank them enough, but we still will be left with a little (ok more than a little) wedding debt, but in the last year we have shown ourselves how hard we can save so it won’t take us long to pay it off. I think most people these days have to take on a wedding debt, as wedding do cost so much. The best advice I can give is start a spreadsheet with all the costs, deposits paid and when the final balances are due. Work out what you realistically can save each month, stretch yourself more than you think, trust me you can make it work, we are so surprised at what we have been saving and I don’t feel like we have missed the money too much. You have to learn to say no things like nights out, weekends away, holidays and the biggest thing for us was not eating out as frequent as we did or having way too many Chinese takeaways. Stick to your saving plan be strict and it will all be worth it!!
Days to go: 150 days