Today’s post is the ugly sister of yesterday’s. Not a single sequin or cascading bouquet in sight, this is all about what I would like to ban going forward. If there were a room 101, all of this would be in it. Oh and Gerberas are always on this list, they’ve been on it 2 years running now but I will grow tired of writing it every year.
This post is obviously not meant to cause offence, it is based on my own superior taste and nothing more. Shall we start? Oh god.
Obviously I do not wish to abolish photography. I wish to abolish couples choosing their friend who owns a camera to do their photography. I know that a wedding can be expensive but you really should spend as much as you can on photography, there is no point putting all that time and effort in to your wedding to have no visual memory of how wonderful it all looked. If photography isn’t important to you then fine, spend your money how you wish, but read this post first.
A quick scout on Gumtree leads to quite terrifying things…
Second photography abolishment…the addition of dinosaurs to wedding photos. I just don’t get it?
Yup. Swirrrllly waistcoats made from beautifully cheap polyester. They do not photograph well and date within 4 months.
Tacky french manicures. Nothing worse than a beautiful bouquet being clutched by some low budget talons.
Yeah…I am done with them now. There is a time and a place. They look great in some venues but don’t just chuck in some pom poms because you don’t know what else to do.
We have moved on greatly since the days of the chair cover, if the chairs in the venue are vile, there are much prettier alternatives. Or, you can hire nicer chairs.
I’m not sure if this really was a trend, or if it may have just been an American type trend. But tin cans. Even decorated tin cans…polish a turd springs to mind.
Birdcages. If I see another birdcage…Unless it is a bird themed wedding in which case the birds would have to have a suitable homing situation, then it’s OK. They always get lumped in to the ‘faux vintage’ decor.
“Phoebe, they are pretty, why are you abolishing them?!” I hear you cry. Because this is my personal bug bear. A poorly laid table, epecially crossed cutlery. I blame the Americans for this, they are far too care free with their cutlery. Far too whimsical. It is also a faff for your guests.
“And now you want to get rid of washi tape!? FOR WHY PHOEBE??”. It doesn’t bloody stick!!!!! It looks cute, but by the time you have stuck up all your hipster polaroids of your guests they just fall down. And I think we may be over using it. Sorry.
This doesn’t need an explanation. Vile.
I wasn’t going to put this one in, but I saw someone mention it on Facebook so I decided I would. I would like to abolish the banning of phones/cameras at weddings. I read that they wanted their guests to “be in the moment” and they wouldn’t get that if they were taking photos, they have hired someone to do that for them. But actually, some of my favourite images are those captured by my friends on their phones. I also love the whole “wedding hashtag” so lots of people can join in, especially if they can’t be there. We live in such a different technological time now that banning phones just seems a bit nonsensical. I don’t think any of your guests would be rude enough to spend the whole time texting or calling other people but there are so many little moments that happen at a wedding I think it is great that they will all be captured. So, please don’t ban guests having their phones/cameras, I think you would regret it.
Dare I ask for your thoughts?